tbh if you want free weed just tell a group of stoners you’ve never smoked before and then boom free weed
It may seem like I’m a sarcastic asshole 24/7, but I’m actually only a sarcastic asshole 18/7 because at night I actually have feelings.
hey what if someone invented a machine that allowed women to transfer their pregnancies to men and then the government passed a law that if a woman didn’t want to have a baby the biological father was required to carry it how fast do you think birth control would stop being an issue
BEST NIGHTBLOG POST EVER
"IT’S UNETHICAL TO FORCE PEOPLE TO CARRY A BABY!!!!" MEN SHOUT
"NO FUCKING SHIT!!!!" WOMEN REPLY
my blogging technique is staying gone for a while and then posting 20 posts persecond
Remember when they used to say that gay marriage ruins the sanctity of the institution?
Are fedoras really that bad?
YES YES THEY ARE
I don’t really believe this mumbo jumbo
I mean it’s a goddamn hat.
The white rose, it symbolizes the unique beauty of all the women who wish not to be with a nice guy such as myse-
I wonder if this works with other kinds of hat…
Nothing ventured, nothing gained…
WHEEEN THE MOON HITS YOUR EYE LIKE A BIG PIZZA PIE THAT’S AMORREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
It got better
i bet at the abc family headquarters just has a big red button on a wall labeled “harry potter marathon” in big letters
And there’s a sign next to it that says “It has been  days since our last harry potter marathon”
The higher that number is, the more uneasy the employees feel.